Why Does Anyone Have to Be Out?

March 5, 2011 at 10:17 am (This and That)
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Once again I find myself baffled at the ongoing disruptive concerns over religion and sexuality and the many ways humans can use one or both to place themselves above another or repress the rights of individuals.

A blog by Dr. J, “Diversity and Equality” Means Christians Are Out, also brought to my attention a viewpoint by Sean Gabb in which both articles implied that Christians were now being persecuted for their views or beliefs. My reaction was a deep sigh of disappointment toward a collective era that considers itself intelligent, compassionate, and open to diversity when the truth is we really haven’t learned anything from the bloody tragedies and destructive deities of human history.

Religion has been around since the beginning of human existence. And as humans evolved so did religious dogma. In other words, a religion changed or was fashioned to meet the times, or the greed of those in power, or as a way to control the masses. All religions are man-made, with agendas that favor its human authors, and have nothing to do with one’s personal spirituality and beliefs in the balance between a higher existence, nature, and living beings. Or the stability between equality, freedom, and acceptance.

Every religion has its own spin on righteousness, policy and restrictions, and plenty of bloodshed against those who are different or accused of breaking the rules. What’s even more tragic is that all these religions have never been based on equality and freedom for ALL humans living on this planet regardless of their mindset.

The BBC article referenced in Dr. J’s blog is about how a court ruled that a Christian couple were denied the ability to provide foster care to children because their beliefs opposed homosexuality. Right away the alarm seems to have gone out that the courts are now setting up to actively discriminate against all Christians. And once again sides are ready to go to war, some with words, some with weapons, not to preserve the rights and equality of ALL humans but over segregated ideals that, as history has shown, are touted as being more factual or morally superior than another group.

Everyone is entitled to choose their own lifestyle and moral guidelines. We are also responsible for our actions to ourselves and others. True sin is deliberately hurting or repressing ourselves or another. Sin means not showing respect for ALL of Gods diversity in people, ideals, nature, and animals. No one person is more important or special than another. Each of us has our own gifts and uniqueness to help enrich our lives and those around us.

The world isn’t meant to be a utopia, for only through adversity do we truly learn. But human is human no matter what sex, color, age, country, beliefs, work, or mental and physical gifts. No one should feel like they are out.

How much more adversity do we need to experience before all humans learn to accept this?

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Forget Me Not

February 11, 2011 at 7:40 am (This and That)
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He was an adventurer, the cock of the wall, healthy, strong, and sometimes a little larger than life in his playful arrogance and generosity. In his prime he was a leader of men and a natural born speaker. But all that became distorted as he slid down the backside of fifty.

We met in the Yukon and dated under the midnight sun, the Mississippi man and the Canadian girl. And when the company called, requiring his expertise, we travelled together to the company mines in the Amazon Jungle where he taught me respect for the wild rain forest. I’m happy to say that street-smart, caring man became my husband and best friend what seems a lifetime ago.

Like most people we worked hard and saved for the things we wanted, muddled through tough times, and took care of home, family, and health. Life’s ups and downs didn’t seem so bad because we handled work and decisions together. But in the end that goal of freedom and security slowly withered away under the glaring reality of his uncoordinated shuffle and deteriorating memory.

Knowing now the outcome, would we have lived our lives differently? Followed the wind on our Gold Wing and been a little less responsible for others? When I see the fear or blank stare in his eyes, or hear him struggle to utter a coherent sentence, my heart shouts, yes, we would have followed that dream of adventure while we were strong and capable, instead of setting aside those aspirations for a later day.

Alzheimer’s has become a widely know disease, easily accessible on the internet. Knowing what’s happening and why has given our dark fear a name. But when one feels cheated all those detached, inflexible facts offer little in the way of making lives whole again.

I know I’m not saying anything that hasn’t already been felt or expressed by thousands of others rallying around a loved one. But actually, writing down my thoughts has helped to reconfirm what’s most important to me.

To future caregivers I humbly offer what I’ve learned:

Joy – appreciate every smile and moment of laughter for all too soon they’ll be gone forever

Love – the mind and soul are capable of so many different kinds of affection; open your heart and let something new fill the emptiness

Understanding – recognize that no one is to blame and take each day as it comes

Acceptance – admit, if only to yourself, that it’s okay to be angry, frustrated, and tired on bad days

My husband thinks I’m a genius because I know how to work the remote control. There’s a vulnerable, childlike sweetness about him now that only makes me more determined to keep him safe and happy.

To my best friend: I miss what we had but find myself loving you more.

The Alzheimer’s Society of Canada, Toronto, Canada

The Alzheimer’s Association, Chicago, USA

The ten warning signs of Alzheimer’s disease

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Who Decided What the Code of Sexual Morality Should Be?

January 26, 2011 at 5:15 pm (This and That)
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A January 25th blog by Dr. J (The Western Tradition) regarding Abstinence Gets Some “Scientific” Support brought back some old issues for me. Not so much about the scientific or philosophical views concerning the abstinence of sex before marriage, but about the moral implications that those with a behavioral conduct toward sexual relations before or outside of marriage are considered immoral.

In my opinion, that line of reasoning continues to show a very closed-minded lack of tolerance. History has taught us that each era had its own social customs of convenience and control, where the views of one individual or authoritative group took precedent over a population, who either conformed or faced the consequences.

If, for the sake of argument, we concede that all consenting adults need to use birth control, unless trying to conceive, and practice safe sex always, we are left with only the current cultural values that establish a code of conduct, in this case, sexual right and wrong. But who or what governing body decides what is right and what was wrong?

In general, religion throughout the centuries has always found it expedient to venerate power, wealth, and position over anyone’s spirituality. Doctrine was established to control the population and to keep revenues coming in. It was surprising to learn, although I guess it shouldn’t have been, that priests were not always celibate. That the vow of celibacy was something devised by the church to avoid the responsibility of housing and financial upkeep for spouses and families.

Do we take the word of one of the most holist books that there is only one moral code for sexuality and all other ways are damned to hell? Doesn’t the fact that each book in the Bible, written by men, human beings, give one pause to the unquestionable validity of content and sentiment? Even if it were a proven fact that all religious teachings came from the mind and heart of God, by whatever name, founding religious books were still edited and interpreted by men with their own agendas, fears, and conjectures.

As societies have evolved, wriggling free of the church’s often brutal, hard pressed thumb, new influences, such as kings, queens, dictators, and modern leaders, have taken up the moral two-edged sword of deciding what was, and is, best for the people. Historical guidelines have been handed down generation after generation, taught at home, in schools, and churches because that’s what our parents were taught, what their parents grew up with, and so on with all our ancestors down through time.

In this day of enlightenment and technology I don’t think it’s naive to want to teach our children that all people are created equal, that life is full of choices and consequences, experiences, and that freedom means taking responsibility for your actions while not encroaching on the freedoms of others.

The stigma of sexual moral codes toward premarital sex, sex outside of marriage, sex between homosexuals is not going to change until we start accepting, and teaching those that follow, that everyone has the right to their own choices and that what happens between consenting adults is nobody else’s business.

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